Basic Fiction Writing 101: Scenes
by Molly Noble Bull
The book cover above came from my long historical novel, Sanctuary, set in France in the seventeen hundreds. We will discuss this novel later in this article.
Now for the lesson.
(Part of this lesson came from Techniques of the Selling
Writer by Dwight Swain.)
QUESTIONS:
We have all heard the story of the three little pigs, and “once upon a
time” stories are told in the narrative. Narratives tell.
Example: Once upon a time there were three little pigs.
Scenes show, and they are not written in the narrative. Read on to
learn the difference.
Q: WHAT IS A SCENE?
A: A scene is that part of a chapter, book or story that takes place as
it happens, second by second, and gives the reader the feeling of actually
being there. While narrative writing “tells,” a scene must “show.”
One way a scene shows rather than tells is by the use of dialogue.
Example of dialogue:
[Three small pigs sat huddled together under a bridge, shivering and
squealing from the rain and cold.
“I don’t know about you guys,”
the first one said. “But I’m building me a house. I’ve had enough of being cold
all the time.”
“What will you build it out
of?” the second pig asked.
“Sticks. What else?”]
Dialogue is always enclosed in quotation marks.
How are you would look like this when written in dialogue.
“How are you?”
How are you, he asked, would look like this.
“How are you?” he asked.
I am fine, she replied—would look like this.
“I am fine,” she replied.
Q: WHAT ARE THE ELEMENTS OF A SCENE?
A: Goal
Conflict
Disaster
Q: WHAT COMES IMMEDIATELY AFTER A SCENE?
A: A sequel or a transition should follow a scene.
Q: WHAT IS THE PURPOSE OF A SEQUEL?
A: A sequel comes immediately after a scene, giving the main character
the opportunity to reflect on what
just happened in the story. A sequel also gives the reader the opportunity to rest before going on to another scene.
Q: WHAT ARE THE ELEMENTS OF A SEQUEL?
A: Reaction
Dilemma
Decision
Q: HOW LONG SHOULD A SCENE BE?
A: There are no strict answers, but I think a well-developed scene for an
adult novel should contain from three to five typed, double-spaced pages.
Scenes written for children and young people are shorter.
Q: HOW MANY SCENES SHOULD BE PUT IN A TWENTY-PAGE CHAPTER?
A: It depends on the type of book, but about three or less is about
average.
Q: HOW SHOULD A SCENE BEGIN?
A: A scene should begin with a hook to capture reader interest. It
should also begin with a setting to let the reader know where the action is
taking place.
First settings should be fairly detailed
whether introducing the reader to a new story or a new scene or the main
character. After a particular setting has been well established, transitional
phrases like the ones mentioned below can be substituted for more
detailed settings. The purpose for both settings and transitions are to inform
the reader as to where the action is taking place and to move the action to
another location.
Q: Name some transitional phrases.
A: Three hours later---
When they arrived at ---
At the fair grounds, --
One year later ---
Q: HOW CAN I KNOW I'M READING OR WRITING A SCENE?
A: You will know you are reading or writing a scene if it contains a
second by second account of an event and contains all three elements all scenes
must have.
GOAL
CONFLICT
and ends in DISASTER for the main character.
ASSIGNMENT: Buy some index
cards and a black marker. Prepare to write information on those cards and tack
that information above your keyboard. It will really help.
What to write on the cards.
CARD ONE: Elements of a Scene
Goal
Conflict
Disaster
CARD TWO: Elements of a Sequel
Reaction
Dilemma
Decision
Not all scenes contain dialogue. We will discuss that in future lessons.
We will also talk more about the elements of a scene and the elements of a
sequel.
ASSIGNMENT #2:
Below is a scene from my long historical novel, Sanctuary. Who is the point
of view character in this scene?
This scene begins with a goal for the main character, contains conflict
and ends in disaster for the main character.
Tell in one sentence what the goal of this scene is.In your second
sentence, describe the conflict in the scene. Finally, write a third sentences
and tell how the scene ended in disaster for the main character. Then click
comment and post your answers.
SANCTUARY
First in the Faith of
our Fathers series
Molly Noble Bull
Chapter One
Benoit, France
1740
“You do as you wish,
Louis,” Pierre Dupre said to his brother.
“But after the long walk from Paris, I want to stop and rest before
going home. Mama and Henri will want to hear all about our journey, and I would
like to get some sleep before I start telling our little brother tales of our
adventures.”
“Could it be that my big
brother is tired?” Louis asked with a twinkle in his eye.
“Yes.” Pierre yawned. “I admit it.” He
stretched his tired muscles and yawned again.
Louis threw back his head
and laughed. “Sleep if you want. I intend to pay Rachel’s parents a visit
before going home. I plan to ask their
permission to marry her.”
“Is it not a bit late to
be making such a request? We sail in
two weeks and you said you would marry Rachel aboard ship, yet you barely know
her parents. They might resent the fact
that you failed to step forward with your proposal sooner.”
“I will ask their
forgiveness for the delay, of course.
And I will also encourage them to sail to England with us. I fear Rachel will refuse to go at the last
minute if we leave her mother and father behind.”
“Rachel is strong-willed
and unpredictable,” Pierre said. “And
she is always jumping to conclusions.
However, she is also a good and faithful daughter. Were I wearing your shoes, Louis, I would
have fears as well.”
They stood in front of the
small stone cottage where Rachel and her parents lived. They hadn’t slept much
since heading home. On the previous
night, they seldom stopped to rest.
Pierre doubted that Rachel’s parents would welcome his brother into
their home after they discovered why he came, and he had no desire to hear her
mother and father scold Louis for his tardiness.
Pierre noticed a large
tree surrounded by bushes a short distance away. “I will wait for you under that tree. It will be cool and shady there.”
“As you wish.” Louis smiled. “And sleep well, brother.
I will not be long.”
Pierre watched Louis walk
up to the front door of the cottage and knock.
He found a grassy spot under the tree.
With his brown jacket as a pillow, he stretched out and went to sleep.
Pierre awoke to the rumble
of horses’ hooves and men shouting. He
crawled on his belly to a bushy area near the edge of the tall grass. A young captain in the king’s army kicked
down the door of Rachel’s house.
Soldiers swarmed inside.
He’d defended his younger
brother for as long as he could remember and often fought his battles for
him. But he saw at least thirty armed
men and he with no weapons. Pierre
wanted to hang his head in shame because he couldn’t do anything to help.
“Please, we are innocent!”
he heard Louis shout out from inside the house.
Shattered, Pierre covered
his mouth with his hands to keep from calling out in anger and despair.
“No!” he heard Rachel’s
mother say. “Have mercy! Please!”
Tears filled the corners of his eyes as Pierre heard
more shouting, screams, and then silence.
“No. No!”
“Take the trunk outside!”
the captain shouted to his men.
As they dragged a trunk
out the front door of the house, the captain stood on the lawn outside. Sunlight glinted on the metal buckle of his
jacket. The shiny object mesmerized a
shocked Pierre as the other soldiers brought out furniture, clothes, and other
items.
A thin soldier came out
wearing a blue dress that must have belonged to Rachel’s mother. He paraded around in it, swinging his hips
and making distasteful gestures.
Laughter echoed all around the soldier in the dress.
Pierre fought nausea.
The captain opened the
trunk, spilling its contents on the ground.
Letters and papers blew here and there.
The captain picked up a candlestick.
The metal caught the afternoon sun, sparkling brighter than the
buckle. From a distance, Pierre
could not tell for sure but thought it might have been made of gold.
The expensive-looking
object would hold half a dozen candles or more. He’d never seen a design quite
like it.
The captain waved the
candlestick in the air for all to see.
“This is a Menorah and can
only belong to a Jew. It proves the
people who lived in that house were Jews!”
The rest of the men
gathered around the captain, looking at the candlestick. When they tried to touch it, the captain
jerked it out of their reach.
“Two Huguenots from this
village conspired against the government of France. We only found one. We
must find the other man and the rest of the Jews and kill them.”
The captain raised the
Menorah in the air as though it were a kind of battle flag. “I shall not rest until the deed is
done! Now, gather up all the papers and
anything else you think I might want later.”
As the soldiers began doing
as they were told, the captain leaned over and picked up something from the
ground. Pierre thought it looked about
the size and shape of a small wooden frame.
The captain pulled a white cloth from his pocket, wiped off the object,
gazed at it for a long moment and tucked it inside his jacket.
“Burn this house to the
ground,” the captain demanded, “as a warning to all Jews and Huguenots!”
#
Sanctuary by Molly Noble Bull won two national contests in 2008 in the inspirational category--the Gayle Wilson and the Winter Rose contest. To buy Sanctuary or any of Molly's books and e-books, write Molly Noble Bull in the search slot at online and walk-in bookstores.
